25 Years LaterFarewell to Buffy
by CodyLuvJones
Summary: Buffy is dying and her friends have gathered to see her one last time.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I am an avid fan of the television series. I wanted to do a tribute piece to Buffy 25 years later...**

**Chapter One**

She sat comfortably wrapped in thick blankets on the old rocking chair that sat before the lolling waves of the ocean. She sipped at her hot tea as a breeze from the sea cliff stirred and rustled the tall amber grasses around her home. A flock of seagulls flew away from the setting sun, rapidly flapping their wings and calling out to each other to keep the rythym of feather and flight. She didn't look up to see them pass as she had done many times before. Instead, she fixed her gaze on the approaching shadows as night crept invitingly closer and closer.

" Ms. Summers?" A voice called out from the house.

Buffy gave a half smile. Even at the age of forty eight, she still pictured her mother in all her golden glory to answer. But that was a life time ago.

" Yes, Claire."

The tall, wispy form came closer to her and put a tentative hand on her shoulder. " Should we be going in now? The sea is bringing the cold in."

Buffy smiled at Clare's brown sugar eyes which showed concern. " Not yet. Please stay with me and watch the sun set."

Clare obliged and leaned against the railing of the wooden porch. " I've got the rooms ready for your guests." She supplied patting down her well oiled afro and checking her watch. " They should be arriving soon."

Buffy nodded in agreement and felt her insides quiver in excitement. She couldn't wait to see them all again, one last time: Willow, Xander, Dawn, Robin and of course Giles. Giles was getting up there in age and he could barely see but he was still Giles and he would always be her watcher.

" I can't wait to see how the kids have grown." Buffy told Claire.

Claire laughed out loud. " They grow up fast! Last time we saw them, they were just starting to walk. Aren't the twins ten? And Faith's boy..." She let her voice trail off as she caught the look of pain that flitted across Buffy's eyes.

Buffy exhaled slowly, rising above the pain until it no longer touched her. " Raven is twelve." She continued on as if nothing had happened. " I'm glad Robin is bringing him up to see me. He kind of went awol for a while after the death of Faith." Buffy mused inwardly that saying it outloud no longer hurt her. Perhaps it was because she too was nearing her end.

A slayer was never meant to live a long life. The constant mending and breaking of bones and other traumatic injuries took their toll upon mortal flesh. Human eyes and memories were locked into things they should never have had to witness. Faith knew this and had taken herself out five years ago during a mission which had gone very badly. She and Robin had been seperated for two years already but that hadn't stopped him from going into hiding to recover. Their son had helped with that Buffy was sure of it and the fact that they were coming to see her off was further proof that the worst of it was behind them. She hoped that her passing didn't re-open old wounds.

" I need to start your evening meds, Ms. Summers." Claire stated simply. She rose from her post and briefly touched Buffy's shoulder as she walked back into the house.

Buffy sighed and finished the rest of her tea before snuggling deeper into her blankets. She wondered what the twins looked like now. Of course they talked to Aunt Buffy on a weekly basis and shared with her the horrors of piano lessons and pre-pubescent boys. They had Xander's dark, shining curls and Dawn's light. They were beautiful and perhaps she was a little biased but they were all precious to her.

Suddenly, a figure crossed towards her with lightening speed as a stillness settled in. " Slayer."

Buffy's heart did a little dance. " I missed you."

Spike knelt in front of her and touched her face with a cool hand. " You never have to miss me, Pet. I'll always be here."

He was still smooth, dashing and hadn't aged a day and a half. Buffy smiled. " I know. Did you take care of the demony thingy?"

Spike grinned. " Let's not talk shop, Pet. How are you feeling?"

Buffy winced at the pain and concern he tried to hide deep in his eyes. She didn't want anyone to worry for her. " Today, I'm okay. The gang is coming. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone."

" Good. Willow still bringing her Doctor friend?"

" Yes." Buffy replied. " But the Doctor friend is her girlfriend, Angela and not a Doctor for me." She gave him a look that told him to stop worrying but that was one thing Spike was never good at. " Besides, she's a pediatrician. I'm not a child."

" Well," Spike scoffed, " she'll be good in a pinch if one of the little nibblets loses an arm, won't she?"

Buffy laughed and held out her hand so that he took it in his and clasped it to his heart. They remained like this for a while and seconds became minutes and minutes were turning into...

" I see a car!" Claire exclaimed from inside the house. " Someone is coming!"

**I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter and won't get too mad that I'm killing Buffy. It will be a dignified and beautiful ending. I just wanted to do something that hadn't really been done before. Let me know what you think of chapter one. I'll update...I think if you guys like it enough...lol.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Buffy rose too quickly from her chair and nearly lost her balance. Spike grabbed her carefully, gently and set her right again. She laughed at her clumsiness and his quick reflexes. He held on for a moment longer. " Okay." She scoffed, pushing his arms away. " I'm not an invalid."

" I never said you were." There was a look of hurt in his eyes.

" I'm just dying, not weak at the knees or needing a walker." Buffy said in a feeble attempt at humor.

" It doesn't have to be like that." Spike told her.

Buffy frowned as she realized what he was referring to. It had been an ongoing argument of theirs. She wouldn't be dying if he turned her into a vampire. He had even gone as far as to have Willow ready with the soul spell the moment Buffy gave consent. But she never would. It was her time to go and she was willing. She'd been to heaven before and it wasn't such a bad place to retire for eternity. " Spike." Buffy let sound of his name hang in the heated air between them.

There was an intimacy between the two of them that would never fade, even after she passed. Part of her wanted to surrender to his desire and be by his side forever or however long they had left. No more pain, always loved and...but it was the and that stayed her wishful thinking to just wishful thinking.

She reached up with a hand that could no longer drive stakes through hearts and cradled his youthful face. " Spike." She repeated again as he closed his eyes to the feel of her.

Spike opened his eyes again and kept his emotions in check. He didn't want to do anything more to drain her. He could tell by the flush of her cheeks she was trying to keep the pain at bay. " Aren't we a pair." He quipped picking up the mood. " I smell librarian in the air." She chuckled and that made his night.

Giles was already seated in the big armchair by the wood fireplace when Buffy and Spike walked in. His hair was gray and his hand never left the hilt of his walking cane but he was still Giles. He felt their arrival before his eyes could make out the shadows.

" Buffy."

Buffy covered him in a hug and for the first time in a long time, felt tears spring to her eyes and fall to the shoulder of his jacket. " So good to see you." She managed to get out.

" There, there." Giles patted her gently on the back. " I'm not the one dying...you are."

The room froze for a beat and then maddening laughter filled the air as Giles and Buffy held on the each other and savored the familiarity, the contentment and the reconnection.

" How are you doing?" He asked her once they finally came back down to speaking level. He gave her a long, searching look and even though his eyes were dim and failing, he still saw much.

Buffy shrugged and balanced herself on the arm of his chair. " Well, you know. I could list a whole page of complaints from my back to my kness but I won't bore you with the details. Besides, you probably have a list for me too. I'll just say I'm fine and I'm so happy you're here."

" Aren't we a pair?" Giles told her.

Buffy kissed the crown of his curly grays and put her arm around him.

" Giles." Spike said quietly coming over to awkwardly pat his arm.

" Spike." Giles looked genuinely glad to see him. " I heard you were in Rome hunting down the last of the Slavron demon. How did it go?"

Spike shrugged. " It went. I think it's safe to say the Slavron kin are on the extinction list. At least now we don't have to worry about little kiddies losing their souls."

Giles nodded and they stared at each other in quasi uncomfortable silence. " I'll go fetch your things from the car." Spike said breaking the spell.

" Why, yes of course." Giles muttered. " Thank you, Spike."

" I like it when you guys get along." Buffy mused. " It gives me a warm, tingly feeling inside."

Claire came in carrying a tray of tea which she sat by Giles. " Here you are, Chamomile tea just how you like it. I've added a touch of honey."

Giles blushed as Claire kissed his cheek and then hurried off to do something else.

" She has a crush on you. I never get honey in my tea." Buffy said jokingly.

" She is a delightful, young lady." Giles sipped at his tea before setting it back on the tray.

Buffy smiled and moved to the armchair opposite him. She watched the dance of the fire on the log. Her soul was at rest. Soon, the others would come and they would laugh, reminisce and maybe cry just a little. The crying got easier and less frequent for her. She was past the part of feeling sorry for herself and she was past getting angry at things that were beyond anyone's control. She was just going to enjoy being with the ones who loved her most and knew her best. This was a dream come true.

" Buffy! Giles!." They both turned in time to see Willow in the doorway, breathless, happy, smiling, shining and pregnant...?!!!

**Disclaimer...I do not own Buffy or any characters or references to characters of Buffy. I'm just an avid fan. I hope you like chapter two. Let me know. I am new to this process and I'm enjoying myself very, very much. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I truly, truly appreciate it and with the week I'm having...your comments are putting a much needed smile to my face. Thank you again.**


	3. Chapter 3

**chapter three**

Buffy's jaw dropped in amazement as her pregnant best friend ran towards her and hugged her tight. Willow's hair was still red and long and woven with gray hairs and it smelled of raspberries. " It's so good to see you." Buffy exclaimed. "...and the belly. Willow!!!!!"

Willow laughed and patted her rounded stomach. " I know...we wanted to be sure...so we didn't tell anyone but you were the first person on the list."

" Willow." Giles mused as he got a hug from her as well. " Did you happen upon this naturally?"

" He's asking if you got a human in the oven, Red." Spike reappeared in the doorway. He didn't even wait for a response, just side stepped Angela and bounded up the stairs with suitcases in tow.

" That's not what I meant." Giles muttered stirring his tea and taking another measured sip.

Angela laughed and let her fingers linger on Willow's cheek. " We used the wonderful advances of modern medicine to get us pregnant." She replied smoothing down her ponytail.

"...and some Wicca spells to make sure the baby would be a girl. We are going to call her Buffy Tara Rosenberg-Hall." Willow added still beaming as bright as the sun.

Buffy felt a pang of something bittersweet but choked it down with a smile. " That's quite a name."

" Yes. Quite a special name." Giles said regaining his composure.

Buffy watched Willow and Angela beaming into each other's eyes. They had been together for less than two years but their love was the stuff of legends. Willow and Kennedy had split amicably some years back after Kennedy's exploits to train young slayers kept them further and further apart. Willow had quietly joined a coven in Arizona where she placed emphasized the healing potential of her powers. She'd had met Angela at a healing retreat where Western medicine was tentatively forming an alliance with other practices. It had been love at first sight for the both of them. Buffy knew as soon as Willow told her about Angela that she never needed to worry about Willow being lonely ever again.

" We are going to go put our things away." Angela told them, carefully helping Willow up.

" Yeah." Willow carefully tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. " I'll be right back to catch up with all the talkie by the fire."

Buffy watched their retreating shapes and suddenly felt a need to be by herself. She looked up in time to see Claire return and fuss over a blushing Giles.

" I'm going to go change. I'll be back too." She rose and left her blankets on her chair. Neither Claire or Giles responded and she half chuckled before heading to her room at the back of the hall.

She had scarce time to open her door when the pain ricochet off her insides and made her silently gasp. She gripped the door handle to keep from crying out and stumbled over to her bed where she fell upon her comforter. Prespiration formed on her temples and the back of her neck and hot, angry tears fell languidly from the corners of her eyes. She cried out silently in pain again as another wave hit her. She couldn't let the others know just how bad things were for her. She didn't want them to pity what she'd turned into. The consolation prize for being the world's oldest living slayer was her spirit was trapped inside a body that had broken down and was falling apart. It wasn't a matter of why but when and how much longer did she have. Her mind grew fuzzy and pulsated as Buffy quickly grabbed the cup of pills Claire faithfully put on her nightstand and swallowed them dry. She sobbed silently into her pillow. How much longer could she hold out? This was such a sucky consolation prize.

Buffy opened her blurry eyes to the dark bedroom willing the pain to leave. It had to leave. Her spirit was still strong...still wanted life to live. Something in the corner moved and walked towards her.

" Angel?" She had to be hallucinating now. Angel hadn't been seen or heard from since the Great Fight back in LA. Even Spike who had fought side by side with him up until the very end wasn't sure if he was dust or not. It was but a dream; her weakening mind conjuring up images that brought joy or happiness. She shakily half rose on her bed, willing the shadow to fade into the background and stop playing tricks with her but it refused. Instead it grew and formed into a solid figure who reached out and caught her as she fell forward again.

Buffy was confused and relieved at the same time. The figure cradled her head and suddenly her pain melted away as if it had never been. Buffy squinted to get a better look. The face was pale and rugged. The eyes were dark yet comforting. She breathed in the smell she would never forget.

" I...." she couldn't form words to finish the sentence or question. She wasn't sure which it was. She grabbed him ferociously, with all the strength her waning body would allow her.

" I've never left you." Angel said quietly.

Was her mind muddled? Was she seriously losing it? Buffy tried to scramble her thoughts together to say something...anything. She was crying again and still trying to hold on as he was slipping away.

" Angel." She cried but it was too late. He was already leaving. If death meant she'd be apart from him forever then she didn't want it. Let her live a prisoner in her body and be slave to her pain if it meant he would be there.

Suddenly, the lights turned on and Spike was at her side where Angel had been just moments before. Buffy clung to him as she had many times before when the pain and pressure of it all just became too great for the world's oldest slayer.

" I'm here, Pet." He mumured stroking her hair. " I'm here."

Buffy managed to get herself together. Her sobs slowed and her choking subsided. She drew comfort from him.

" Did you take your meds?" He asked concerned.

She nodded.

" Well, then...you'll be right as rain again."

" Yes." She said quietly.

" Maybe you should turn in early." He suggested kindly.

Buffy sighed deeply and slowly sat up, wiping away her tears. " I'm okay."

Spike didn't say anything.

" I think I saw Angel." She studied his face for a reaction.

" Wow." Spike mused. " That's a doozy."

Buffy nodded and sniffed. " Tell me about it."

" I came to tell you the rest of the Scoobys are here." He said.

" Okay."

" Your sister came up alone with the kiddies. Xander rode up with Robin and his boy."

Buffy gave Spike a pointed look.

" I think Xander's been spending a lot of time with Robin and his boy if you catch my drift."

" Spike!" The lightness was back in her voice.

" Talk to your sister." Spike said. " I think she needs you now."

He left her to freshen up. Buffy licked her lips and studied the corner from where the shadow had come with clearer eyes. She saw nothing out of the ordinary except a chair and her sweater thrown haphazardly across it. Was her mind playing tricks on her as well? She shook her head and took a few swigs of the bottled water by her bed. It was time to smile and greet the rest of the troops. They could never see the truth. She wouldn't allow it.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

The noise of a full house hit Buffy's ears as soon as she opened her door. She was immediately bombarded by the twins who grabbed her around the waist in a bear hug.

" Aunt Buffy." They chorused with shining eyes and dark hair.

Buffy fell against the wall as she grabbed on to them and held them close, kissing the top of their heads. " Joycelyn, Jesse...I've missed you guys." She breathed in their aroma of impish charm and drew them back to get a closer look.

Jesse was getting taller and leaner than his sister and he was sporting a mohawk. Joycelyn still held on to her baby fat and dimples and she had bangs. Buffy kissed them again. " You are getting so big. You are almost as big as me!"

" Really?" Joycelyn asked.

" No not really." Jesse answered her. " Adults always say that and then they pinch your cheeks really hard like Great Aunt Arlene." Buffy laughed at the look of disapproval he gave.

" Well, I have resisted the urge to pinch cheeks." Buffy proclaimed holding up her hand in mock salute.

Xander appeared from the bathroom and stopped in his tracks. " If it isn't the woman I'd drive 1,000 miles to see."

He too was showing gray hair and age had forced upon him glasses but they were sporty as well as the patch that covered his empty eye socket.

" Xander." Buffy said his name and pulled him into a hug.

He leaned against her and sighed, tousling the heads of his children as they stood on either side of her.

At first, it had been a weird when years ago, Xander pulled Buffy aside and told her he had strong feelings for her little sister. Dawn and Xander had remained a stone's throw from the other as she went to school and got her child psychology degree and he began the foundation of a highly successful contracting business. Buffy had always been grateful that while the rest of the Scooby's were off doing this or that and completing missions overseas; Xander had been a reliable and steadfast support for Dawn. She, along with everyone else never thought that would lead to love, marriage and two babies in a baby carriage but she along with everyone else adjusted and they believed Dawn and Xander were meant for each other. They'd been through so much together that it added a certain level of intimacy and commitment to their marriage that few couples achieved. They were also amazing parents. Xander did it all from teaching the junior soccer leagues and volunteering at the childrens' schools. Dawn drove them to their appointments and games and playdates and excursions. They both made a solid team.

Xander sighed again and Buffy thought she saw him wipe something from his face. She gave him a pointed look but he smiled bashfully and took a step back.

" The gang is all here." He told her. " Just tell us who are we battling now?"

Buffy smiled brightly to try and mask the apparent sadness that clung to his face. " No battling this time." She told him.

" I wanna battle." Jesse chimed in.

" No!" Xander and Buffy both said in unison.

" But, I'm a purple belt in karate." He wailed at them.

" Okay." Xander relented with a yawn of resignation. " Go get Spike."

" Xander!" Buffy playfully hit him on the arm as Jesse hopped up and down and ran off in search of Spike.

" Go easy on him." Buffy called out to him.

" Okay." Jesse was already halfway up the stairs.

Jocelyn shook her head at her brother's departure. " I'm going to make sure he doesn't hurt himself." She followed him.

Buffy and Xander watched her head down the hall and after her twin. " How do you do it?" She asked him, impressed. " They are such amazing kids."

Xander squeezed her shoulder. " Aren't you a little biased?" He asked her.

Buffy squinted and held up two fingers to show how much. " Maybe...just a little."

They both slowly walked down the hall to join the others.

" Dawnie here?" She asked him carefully.

Xander seemed to wince at the mention of her sister's name. " I guess Spike told you, huh?"

Buffy stopped walking and stared at him fully. " So, it's true?"

He dodged her searching eyes and kept his head slightly bowed. " If you're asking if it's true I spend a lot of time with Robin and Raven then...yes. If you're asking if my marriage is over then...I really couldn't tell you." He stopped talking as if the weight of it all would be too much to control.

"...Xander." She wanted to reach out for him and console him but she stayed her hand. " I know Dawn still loves you." It was all she could say.

" I know she does too." Xander agreed. " But, that may not be enough." He looked at Buffy's face and immediately lightenend his tune. " But...you don't need this right now. Dawn and I will be fine. The kids are okay. I didn't come here to cry on anyone's shoulders, Buffy. I'm still Xander."

" I know." She smiled back at his bravery. " And I love you for it very, very much."

" I came here for you." He told her with emphasis. " For however long we have left...I came here for you."

Buffy grabbed his hand and they continued walking down the hall in silence. He gave her companionship and strength just like he'd always given her. He was the rock that kept them all together. She kissed his hand and rubbed it against her cheek.

" Don't get all smushy, kissy with me." Xander joked pulling his hand away. " I'm a married man!"

She laughed again and punched him in the arm, wrapping her hand around him again so he couldn't get away.

" Slayer strength!" He replied wiggling. " Don't ever let them tell you, you don't have it. You still got it."

They put aside their personal heartache and worry and giggled and teased each other into the living room.

Giles was on his second cup of tea, Robin and Willow were in deep discussion on the couches and Raven was reading a book in the corner. Buffy took a moment to breathe it all in and savor the mental picture she would keep with her always.

Angela and Dawn appeared from the kitchen with a tray of chips and dip.

Dawn would always be the key of light. Her hair was down and free. Her lips were laughing at whatever Angela was telling her. Buffy was so glad to see her. The sister's locked their gazes on each other. It had been a while since they last saw each other face to face. Xander took that cue and dutifully stepped out to encourage Raven to go beat up "uncle" Spike.

Buffy smiled at her sister and walked over to her with arms stretched open wide. " Dawnie." She cried out.

I do not own the rights to Buffy and or the characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I just love them. Please comment and critic. I am very thankful you took the time to read my chapters. Thank you again.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

" Buffy." Dawn squealed, kissing her cheeks and squeezing her hands so hard that even Buffy winced. " You just don't know how much I've missed you."

Buffy breathed in the smell of Dawn and put a tendril of her sister's hair behind her ears. " I'm glad you're here, Dawnie."

" You look really happy." Dawn told her giving Buffy the once over and nodding in appreciation at what she saw.

" What can I say?" Buffy shrugged. " I guess death becomes me."

It was her feeble attempt to make light of the situation and put everyone at ease but all it did was force an uncomfortable stillness within the cozy group. Dawn's face flushed and she looked away as her eyes watered. Everyone else was unable to move.

Buffy fidgeted. " Can't anyone take a joke?" She challenged softly. " I thought we were the jokey type of gang." She looked around imploringly at each of them.

" I'm afraid we can't joke about this, Buffy." Giles said before the silence became too thickening. He looked as if he wanted to say more but then simply took his glasses off his face and began to clean them with his handkercheif.

Buffy groaned again. " It's okay. It's going to be okay." She told them. " We are here to be together and have fun and walk down memory lane. I don't want anyone to be sad." She had planned a longer more thought out speech but this one would have to do. She didn't want her friends to mope or feel uncomfortable around her. She wanted everything to be out in the open and free. It was the only way she would be okay about everything. It was the only way she could cope. Her time was ending but she didn't want to go out curled up in bed or staring out the window. She wanted to be laughing and surrounded by the people she loved the most. She had just hoped that they would laugh too and enjoy what little time they had left for however long it was.

" Sorry, Buffy." Willow said. " See...these are our happy faces." She gave a deep and brave smile and everyone else followed her example.

" Okay!" Xander clapped his hands and rubbed them together. " Whose up for a game of Poker?"

" Did I hear Poker?" Spike trotted down the stairs, unscathed from the attacks of the little people.

" We aren't playing for kittens." Xander told him.

" I'm not interested in kittens silly boy. All that dander and fur...we can play for money. Do you still have some of that?" Spike smirked and raised his eyebrows at Xander.

" Where are the kids?" Robin asked Spike, perhaps making sure he didn't do away with them.

" They are upstairs watching a movie." Spike told him. " I do know a thing or two about kiddies."

" That they make a delicious midnight snack." Xander quipped a little too pleased that he was able to get back at him. It didn't have the same effect and Xander wilted just a bit.

" We're in." Willow declared also speaking for her girlfriend.

" No cheating, Witch." Spike warned but there was a lightness to his tone and a mischevious glint to his eyes.

" I suppose I'll play as well." Giles said. " I might need some help though."

" Let's have partners." Robin replied presenting the perfect solution. " Willow and Angela, I'll team up with Rupert and Xander...you..." He paused in a moment of confusion as he realized Xander's choices. " You are with Buffy. Dawn with Spike." He seemed to breathe a sigh of relief as he figured out the correct answer to the problem.

" I'll just watch." Buffy told everyone sitting on the arm of a chair.

" Me too." Dawn sighed. " I'm not too good at making a Poker face."

" Okay." Robin shook his head as he was resigned to his fate. " I"ll take the vampire."

" No way!" Spike protested. " I'd rather take Nancy boy than you. Besides, last we all played, you lost terribly and ended up writing IOUs to everyone. No, thank you."

Robin smiled as he remembered and shrugged his shoulders. " Nancy." He said to Xander, " you are with Spike."

Buffy laughed and Dawn hid a smile. " It's great to have everyone together." Buffy told her.

" Yeah. All the arguing and fighting and teasing...just like old times...huh?" Dawn linked her arm through her's.

Buffy smiled. " I'm going to get some more refreshments. If memory serves correctly they are going to get pretty thirsty."

Buffy rose and went into the kitchen and Dawn followed her as the others prepared for a competitve game of cards without the kittens.

She opened the fridge and grabbed the pitcher of ice tea Clare had made that morning. She set it down on the counter and reached for the plastic cups still in the supermarket bag.

" Finally, we are alone." Dawn told her setting the cups down individually and pouring the tea in.

" Yes." Buffy sighed and leaned against the counter as her sister finished for her. She was feeling a little tired and worn and it was good to just be and soak it all in. " The gang looks good." She commented.

" Yeah." Dawn agreed. She stopped pouring and stuffed her hands in her jeans.

" Robin looks really good. I guess he finally got over Faith's death." Buffy said as casually as she could. She felt Dawns gaze on her; probing, searching.

" Actually, he isn't over her." Dawn stated simply. " I mean he has his son, and his work and he keeps himself busy but he isn't over her. He will never be over her."

" Oh." Buffy tried to keep the tone light and grabbed an apple from the fruit basket and rolled it around her hands. It wasn't working.

" How do you live without the one person that means the most to you in this life?" Dawn asked Buffy. " Why are you expected to?"

Buffy cringed because there were tears in her sister's eyes and she knew they were talking about a lot more than Faith and Robin. " Dawnie," she began. " I know this is hard." Buffy choked back a sob as everything began to pull and weigh her down. " But, we have to pull through this. There is a way to make this okay." She reached for her sister's hand and was shocked when Dawn pulled away to wipe her tears.

" There is a way for all of this to be okay." Dawn told her with determination. " You just won't do it."

Buffy knew that Dawn was speaking of Spike's idea to turn her and her stomach churned as a queasy feeling began it's rise at the pit of her being. " Dawn...I can't do that. You have to understand."

" It isn't fair." Dawn sulked and for a moment, they were teenagers back home arguing over who ruined whose shirt with ketchup. Joyce would come in with diplomacy and patience and make it all right again. But they weren't little girls anymore and Joyce was long dead. Buffy would soon be joining her.

" It's my time." Buffy told her. " You think I want to be turned into--and...watch all of you grow old and eventually die. Is that fair?"

Dawn looked away from her and didn't answer.

" I need you to be okay with this." Buffy told her. " I need you to keep me strong in this, Dawnie. Because, no matter how you look at it...it's going to happen. The end will come for me and I need to accept and have my friends and family accept. This isn't easy for me." Buffy let her voice trail off as Dawn grabbed her into another ferocious hug.

" I know Buffy." She cried sweetly against her cheek. " I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

The Summer's girls hung on to each other and cried together. The queasiness in Buffy's stomach subsided and she felt her tears recede as Dawn calmed down and dried her own eyes. They smiled at the other and laughed a little. Buffy resumed her rolling of the apple as the ambience eased back into harmony.

" So..." she said to Dawn who was gathering the drinks to take to the Poker players. " Wanna tell me what's going on with you and Xander?"

Thank you for reading this. As I have said before, I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of the characters. I am so appreciative of everyone who took the time to comment. I appreciate all of your remarks and ideas and critics. I am also thankful for my beta reader Emerald Celebi 13. Again, thank you for the input and the encouragement. I look forward to hearing what you guys think of this chapter. Take care and enjoy your week...


	6. Chapter 6

**C**hapter 6

Dawn grimaced and then shrugged as if there was really nothing much to talk about.

" What exactly do you mean?" She asked smoothing her hair back into an unkempt ponytail.

" Dawn," Buffy said raising her eyebrows. " What's up with the whole separate car thingy and Xander sleeping on Robin's couch?"

" He likes it there." Dawn said sheepishly.

" Dawnie." Buffy watched her as she gathered the dish rag and refolded it back over the sink. "...Well...?"

" Buffy...," Dawn hesitated and shot her sister a pleading look. " Xander and I are re-evaluating some things." She said at last in a swoosh of air and exhaling.

" What does that mean?" Buffy asked. She remembered when her parents told her they were re-evaluating their marriage and right after that methodical talk of hugs and reasonings, her dad moved out and divorce followed soon after. " Are you headed for divorce?" She asked Dawn suddenly.

Dawn licked her lips and again refolded the dish rag. " I told him I'm not in love with him anymore."

" You know, Claire likes her dish rags folded a certain way. She might get pretty miffed if she comes down in the morning to make breakfast and she finds it's been tampered." Buffy pretended not to hear what Dawn had just blurted out.

" I know you heard me." Dawn huffed.

Buffy stepped back and grabbed hold to the cool comfort of the counter. Yes, it had taken a moment to get used to Xander and her sister but it had only taken that moment and she'd had years and twins to truly make her feel as if it was meant to be. Xander and Dawn were destined. Xander and Dawn. Dawn and Xander. Her sister had what she could never have...a normal life and Buffy drew comfort from that. But, it seemed to be dissolving out of a fancy Dawn thought she'd discovered. Her sister was flippant. Buffy couldn't believe Dawn wanted to be without Xander. Xander couldn't be without Dawn so her sister was the culprit in the happily ever after fable.

" Dawn," Buffy began as easily and calmly as she could. " How do you even know you don't love him anymore? What brought all this on?" She secretly hoped there was some enchantment going on.

Dawn moaned and fidgeted and then pulled up a chair for Buffy to sit in. She remained standing so she could pace. " I met someone and I had an affair."

Buffy's mouth dropped open and she was grateful she was sitting. " Dawnie!" Would a time out work? This was bad, very bad but she could fix it.

" I didn't want to tell you." Dawn said quickly. " Not like this. We both didn't...but you are just so determined to find out stuff."

Dawn knelt by her sister's lap and held her hands in her own.

Buffy didn't return the squeeze immediately but she finally gave in and tried to keep the tears from welling up in her eyes as she stared back at Dawn.

" I'm not a weakling." She told Dawn gently but firmly. " I can handle hearing life changing incidences. I mean, I saved the world...like a lot. I'm still me."

" Buffy, it was a private matter." Dawn replied. "...between Xander and I. This isn't really a save the world type of gig."

Buffy sighed but Dawn was right and this gave her comfort. Her little sister was all grown up and could handle life well enough on her own. She'd be okay when Buffy left and she wouldn't have to worry. She nodded, smiled down at Dawn and then rose from the chair. Buffy snickered as she caught herself refolding the same tired dish rag.

" So, you had an affair and you realized..." She couldn't finish the sentence.

"...I realized that I will always love Xander, but I'm not in love with Xander." Dawn finished for her.

" I mean, he will always be a part of my life and be there for the kids and we will continue to do things together and support each other but I wanna find my own way." Dawn stated. " All my life I've been taken care of and protected and guided and it's been great and I am so appreciative but I feel like I've never given myself the opportunity to branch out on my own."

" So, you wanna join a circus?" Buffy quipped.

Dawn chuckled. " Not quite. I'm still me. I'm just me without him and I'm okay with that."

" Well, is he?" Buffy looked deep into her sister's face.

Dawn shrugged and pushed the chair back into the table. " It's hard on him. It's an adjustment for all of us. I don't wanna go back, Buffy. I'm happy. Xander and I will work on having a strong co-parenting relationship. We are going to be okay."

" Is this from one of your psyche books?" Buffy asked.

Dawn half smiled and rolled her eyes. " Yes." She admitted. " But Xander understands this and he is letting me go."

" Wow." Buffy sighed, pursing her lips. " I guess life just keeps going even when you stop participating. Dawnie, I support you and Xander. I secretly hope you guys will work things out but it's not for me to live your life. I'm here for you both."

They hugged again and Buffy kissed her cheek. " Anything else I should know about?" She tried to give her sister a serious look but the heaviness lifted and the lightness returned.

" Well, Willow is gay." Dawn said smugly.

Buffy laughed the hardest she'd laughed since the gang had gathered to see her.

Just then, Xander stuck his head in the doorway. " I came to get drinks. Losing makes people thirsty."

Dawn stepped aside and ushered him towards the waiting cups. " Here you are." She said cheerily. All uneasiness or frigidness between the two was gone as Xander bowed his head to her and she laughed.

Buffy watched them interact. The simplicity was there, the knowing and the mutual admiration and respect. She wasn't worried anymore about them splitting up. They would always be family and that's all that really mattered. She continued to watch them carry the drinks in together to the thristy players in the other room and grabbed a glass of water to drink over the kitchen sink.

It was dark and the moon was but a tear in the sky. She soaked it all in. The gathering waves below; pulling and powerful to the jagged cliffs that surrounded her humble abode and kept the strong winds from beating them mercilessly. Buffy could simply be. She smiled at her reflection in the window, turned away to head back into the others and ran into Spike.

" Spike!" She exclaimed half recovering and half laughing. She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a passionate embrace, kissing him ferociously. She needed him with urgency.

" Slayer." Spike cautioned as his lips were covered in her kisses. " I don't think we should."

" I promise I won't break." She told him solemnly.

Hey guys...I hope you like this one too. Tell me what you think. Also, is there anyone you'd like to see appear, dead or alive. Let me know and I will see if I can't make that happen. I do not own Buffy or the characters. I just love them to pieces. Thank you for all your support. I am appreciative and I will update soon. Bye....


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Spike groaned into her open, waiting mouth and pulled her away so that he could look her in the eyes.

" Now, you know I'm the first in line when it comes to jumping your bones but something tells me there's a bigger picture here." He waited patiently for her to respond.

" Spike". Buffy had the urge to wipe his taste from her mouth but forced it down. " I just wanted to be with you." She told him sweetly.

" Slayer," Spike began fingering her cheek. " This is me you are talking to. Come on...spit it out. What's really eating you up?"

" Gosh, when did 'The Big Bad' get all philosophical on me all of a sudden?" Buffy laughed.

Spike shrugged. " I've always been a thinker, Love. Maybe, you are just now paying attention."

" Stop touching my hair." Buffy told him. She batted his hands away and folded her arms across her chest. " I just wanted to feel normal." She admitted to him. " I mean, I just wanted to feel normal...again. The gang is all here, Willow is pregnant and Dawn is divorcing Xander and I see how I no longer fit in with anyone's lives and how they no longer need me but..." She stopped, unsure of how to go on.

" So, Spike is the cure for your pity party blues? Is that it?"

" No!" She frowned at him. " That's not it. I wanted to be me again. Just me with you and Clare and without feeling this pressure I've been feeling since they walked through the door."

" Pressure?" Spike cocked his head and took a step towards her.

Buffy backed away at first as angry tears splashed down her face. She was so tired of crying. " I don't know." She wiped the tears away and let him hold her.

" Shhhh." He soothed her as only he could do. He was the one that held her when the pain became to much. He kissed her repeatedly on her head. " I think you need to get your rest now. I think morning will come and you'll feel better. I think you should go to bed and I will join in as soon as I've finished beating everybody at Poker and if you still want me; you know I'm yours...or I will just hold you. Whatever you want."

Buffy felt a thousand times better. " But you suck at playing Poker." She pouted at him.

Spike chuckled. " Do I?"

" Losing kittens left and right...," she teased. " Any of that ring a bell?"

Spike laughed and playfully pushed her away before giving her a smack on her rump. " Off to bed. I'll join you later and I'll tell your fan club goodnight for you."

Buffy winked at him and then trotted off to get ready.

She took a hot shower and emerged feeling somewhat rejuvenated. Things were progressing so quickly. She felt like she could scarce catch her breath. Everyone was older, wiser and changing. It made her feel small and insignifigant. They were all living life without her. Part of her was happy and felt at ease that they'd be able to carry on after she passed but another part of her cringed from the thought that life would go on without her. And she would miss out. Would they continue to look after Giles? He was the oldest of them but perhaps the most resilient but Buffy noticed how his hands shook slightly as he held his tea cup. She noticed how it took a while for him to rise from his chair and how he really needed to use the cane to walk. She worried about Xander. He tried to prove to her he was okay with Dawn leaving him but she saw they way he stole plaintive glances at her sister like he still couldn't believe Dawn was over him. Would Willow step in and ease his broken heart or would she be too preoccupied bringing life into the world. New life while Buffy's old one was fading fast. It was ironic. Robin and Faith's son, Raven had eyes full of knowing. She knew he'd make an impeccable watcher. Could Giles continue to mentor him? Would Robin and or Xander? What of her niece and nephew? Would Jocelyn inherit Slayer powers? Would Dawn be okay with having to play sidebar to the Slayer again? The only one who wouldn't change was Spike. He was constant and he'd be always. He wouldn't age and hobble about or disregard and disappear. Would he see the gang through? Or, if once she was gone, would he leave, never to be heard from again. So many questions and not enough answers and she didn't have much time to wait for answers.

Buffy slipped into her satin pajama bottoms and top and slid into the covers of her bed. She had to put her mind to bed too or else she'd be up all night wondering. She nestled her head into her pillow and pulled the covers more snugly around her. She tired to stay up for Spike; wanted to stay up for Spike but her eyes closed heavily and pretty soon she was asleep.

From that same corner of her room, a figure formed and then came towards her as silently as the night. He watched her sleeping form and then tenderly brushed a tendril of golden hair off her face. He watched her body rise and fall with each breath.

" Soon." He promised her.

" Angel?" Buffy asked in a sleep like sigh.

He wasn't at all surprised that part of her would always sense him no matter what. He smiled down at her still sleeping form.

" I'm here." He told her calmly.

" I know." She answered back. Her eyes were still closed and she was still asleep. She answered automatically as if this was how it had always been between them.

" I never left you." Angel whispered back.

The sleeping Buffy smiled.

Angel slid next to her in the bed and pulled her close. He breathed in the smell of her hair and warmed as she scooted closer to him, drawing his hand to her lips to kiss it. Heaven on earth was being in her arms. He closed his eyes to the beating of her heart and nuzzeled into her neck to plant a kiss upon it.

" Buffy." He said it like a prayer.

Thank you for reading, everyone!


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

The early morning sun crept through Buffy's venetian blinds and threw slivers of light across her sleeping face. She cracked open an eye and stretched and yawned like a cat from its nap. She had the vaguest tickling inside her head of an event that was trying to let itself be known to her more clearly. It felt like a fuzzy dream with frayed bits and pieces. She wasn't going to remember anything without her coffee. She took her morning pills, brushed her teeth and threw on her tennis shoes. It had been a ritual of hers to walk down to the local coffee hangout and grab her cup and the daily newspaper. She hadn't been able to make the trip for over a week due to the pain and stiffness she always woke up with but for the first time in a long time, she was rejuvenated and pain free. Buffy wasn't going to wonder about it too much, she was going to take full advantage and just go. The tickling in Buffy's brain became more persistent. She remembered arms around her and someone whispering her name. Spike…? It was just out of reach, she couldn't recall and she gave up trying for the moment. When Spike spent the night in her bed he was always there to greet her in the morning. She shook her head to clear it and walked out her room.

She saw Willow and Xander in the kitchen drinking coffee and talking quietly. They looked up pleasantly when they heard her and she knew they wanted her to join but she was on a mission to get her coffee outside of the house and her morning paper. She couldn't be stopped.

" Hi," she told them briskly. " Did you sleep okay?"

" Like a bear in his cave during a snowstorm," Xander answered her.

" Okay," Buffy chuckled inching towards the front door.

" Angela and I slept pretty sound," Willow replied. " I mean…in spite of all the snoring the bear was doing in the very next room."

Xander feigned embarrassment as Willow and Buffy gave him knowing looks. " A bear can snore," he muttered softly into his mug.

" Well, I'm going to go grab the paper," Buffy told them. " I'm sure Giles will want to check out the crossword section. These beach bums make a pretty crafty puzzle."

" Ahhh," Xander exclaimed. " The Englishman can wet his whistle." He shook his head.

" In case you were wondering, those words really came out of your mouth," Buffy told him.

" I'm just hungry," he admitted. " Clare left to go grocery shopping and she's forbidden us to ruin our appetites in the the meantime. She's making a special breakfast."

" Well…" Buffy cautioned jokingly. " You might wanna do as she says. Clare once ran a bootcamp for unruly kids. She was very successful."

Xander whimpered and continued drinking.

" Is everyone else still asleep," Buffy asked?

"Yeah," Willow answered. " …pretty much. I would walk with you but you know…the belly. I'd only slow you down."

"It's okay," Buffy told her. "I'll be back." She hurried out the door and didn't slow her pace even when her feet hit sidewalk.

She breathed the salty air in deeply and blew it out with gusto. No pain! No pain! She wanted to skip and run but kept it at a brisk walk. There was no point in overdoing and being laid up on someone's lawn. She laughed at the imagery. Clare would never let her leave the house again.

"Hello, Mrs. Lankershins yappy dog," She called out to an overweight Pomeranian inspecting his tulips and giving her a yip and a yap.

"Hi, Kitty," She cooed to the long tabby cat that sometimes frequented her porch. The cat liked to sun itself on her chairs and she sometimes left food out for it. The cat purred as it approached her and rubbed against her legs.

Buffy stopped to greet the kitty and rub its head and neck. "How are you," she asked?

The cat flopped over on its back and waved a paw at her.

"I need my coffee," Buffy told it before resuming her walk.

She kept her pace down the street and only slowed when she came to the bend that was right before the coffee shop. She could already make out the chairs and tables outside that were already being used. People were serious about their morning cup of joe. She carefully walked through the obstacle course of dogs, strollers, joggers and coffee enthusiast and breathed a sigh of relief once she was inside the chocolate colored building with the red roof. She ordered a Hazelnut Latte with a shot of espresso and a blueberry muffin. Buffy was going to break the rules this morning. She felt entitled. After all, she was the one who was dying.

Suddenly, her memory came back with HD clarity and she almost dropped her muffin. Angel was in her bed last night and it wasn't a dream. She could still feel the weight of him next to her and the warmth of his hand on her skin. He was with her; always. Buffy scanned the crowded coffee shop to make sure no one took notice of her flushed face and shaking hands. Satisfied she'd gone undetected, she sugared and creamed her drink before ducking outside again to make the walk back home.

"Angel," she asked once she was out of earshot of regular people and her mouth was void of muffin. She hungrily took another bite of the moist decadence and relished the sweetness of the plump blueberries. She closed her eyes and took another slow gulp of her coffee. She hadn't been able to eat like this for a while. Her body had started rejecting foods and spitting them back out. But, everything seemed to be getting better the first time Angel came to take her pain away. "Angel," she said again.

"He's not here right now," a familiar voice replied.

Buffy spun around with a mouthful of blueberry muffin and some of her drink spilled out. "Huh?" It was the only thing she was capable of uttering.

A form pushed off against the wall he'd been leaning on and sauntered over to her. There was a sway and swagger to every move he made. Buffy's eyes opened in surprise and her face lit up like a Christmas tree. He was older, edgier and wiser and it showed with every step he took but he was still Oz.

"Oz," Buffy threw her arms around him and hugged him tight. She never thought she would see him again.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Oz's hug was strong and secure and the aroma of woods and wildness clung faintly to him. He was a sight for sore eyes and Buffy was more that overjoyed that he had come.

"Wait," she said shaking her head. "How is this even possible? How are you here?"

Oz lifted a brow. "You mean you doubted me coming?"

Buffy smiled and shook her head. "But how did you know?"

"A little birdie told me." Oz shrugged and stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets.

They hadn't seen each other in over five years and even then it had been a quick reunion. Buffy had enlisted his help to track a group of spell creating monks who lived deep in the wet forests along the Oregon coast. Oz quickly picked up their trail and led Buffy and a few other slayers to a clearing where the monks were found safe from harm but turned into squirrels from a spell gone awry. They had had a good laugh then and Oz had even gathered some of the ingredients for the reverse spell before he had to head back home. After that episode, they chatted rather infrequently through email and word of mouth from mutual friends. They were both busy people; Buffy with her teaching and guiding and Oz with his band and wolfiness. She knew that Willow would be ecstatic to see him. She wasn't even sure when the last time they were physically in the same room together.

"You're coming back to the house…right?" Buffy had to quell the urge to pinch herself. It was too good to be true. Her pain was lifted, Angel was with her and now Oz had come to visit.

"Sure," Oz replied. "Let me get my bike." He motioned for her to stay put and he trotted back to the parking lot behind the coffee shop.

Buffy heard a heavy engine roar to life and then she saw a shiny dark motorcycle careen past the pedestrians and sidle up close to her. Buffy's eyes widened in surprise and she quickly downed the rest of her drink and stuffed the remaining muffin in her mouth so her arms would be free.

"Wow," she exclaimed. Her mouth was filled with muffin and she laughed at her faux pas.

"Hop on," Oz told her. He handed her a helmet and sat back.

They sped back to the house on Oz's bike. Buffy's hair whipped wildly behind her and she closed her eyes to the feel of freedom and abandon. It was almost as if you could outrun your life if you traveled fast enough by motorcycle. She was a bit disappointed it was a short and sweet ride but she was even more thrilled to have him see the gang again as well as meet her niece and nephew.

"Everyone is going to be so happy to see you," she told him emphatically.

Oz raised another eyebrow at her. "Will they."

"You know Dawn had twins…right," she asked him putting her key in the lock.

Oz nodded. "So, I heard."

"Everyone came," She didn't know why her eyes crammed with happy tears when she said that but Oz nodded and followed her through the door.

Once inside, he lifted his head and carefully tested the air for scents. "Everyone is really here," he said somewhat surprised. "And Willow is pregnant."

Buffy choked back a yelp and glanced in his direction to gauge his reaction. Oz was chuckling and Buffy let out the breath she'd been holding.

"I also smell some serious eggs, beef and pancakes," He replied. "I could use a good meal. I drove 6 days straight to make sure I got here." He rubbed his grumbling stomach and followed her to the kitchen.

Claire looked up at them as she was putting food in the serving trays. "We decided to eat outside. It is so beautiful outside."

Buffy agreed.

"There is more than enough food. I think I overdid it and made enough for an army."

"Trust me," Oz told her. "You will never have that problem with me around."

Claire laughed and opened the oven where she was warming the already made pancakes. "I'm Claire."

Oz nodded as if he already knew her name by her smell. "I'm Oz."

"Oz," Claire nodded and gave him a knowing glance. "It's good to finally meet you."

"Likewise."

"Well," Claire prompted. "Everyone is waiting on you to begin. I'd hurry on outside before a riot breaks out. I'll be along in a moment."

Buffy and Oz began walking outside.

"And Ms. Buffy," Claire called out. "I can smell that blueberry muffin and latte with espresso you had for breakfast. I'm glad you're feeling better."

Buffy felt like a kid with her hand caught in the cookie jar. She sheepishly smiled back at Claire and led Oz to the gang who was seated at the large picnic table with the spectacular view of the ocean.

What happened next was utter joyfulness. It was Willow who saw them first. She dropped her napkin, let out a high pitched squeal and clumbered over to them with her arms outstretched. She hugged Oz as tightly as her belly would allow.

"Oh, my gosh," she exclaimed. "You're here. You're really here and I can touch you and hug you and squeeze you." Willow wiped at the tears on her face.

Xander patted him on the back and Dawn gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"The lone wolf returns," Robin beamed. He grabbed Oz in a big bear hug and only released him so Willow could hug him again.

"You two know each other?" Buffy asked glancing from Robin to Oz. She tried to picture how they were connected and kept drawing blanks.

"I haven't seen Oz in quite some time," Robin told her. "Faith and I bumped into him during our honeymoon, down in Mexico. "

"Fun times," Oz grinned. He gave Robin a high five and nodded.

"Really," Xander rubbed his chin with his hands. "What did you guys get into."

Robin and Oz looked at each other and bust up laughing. "Man…what did we not get into," Robin said remembering the adventures with a smile.

"Shhh," Oz cautioned. "We made a vow."

"Right, right." Robin nodded and laughed again.

Buffy was pleased to see him carefree and having fun. It was almost like old times.

"But we want to know," Xander pleaded with them. "Why can't we know?"

Oz and Robin zipped their lips up and everyone laughed even though they had no idea why.

Introductions were made soon after and Oz was compliant and happy. He was warm with Angela and curious with the three kids. He seated himself next to Giles to eat and catch up and Buffy sat at the head so she wouldn't miss a thing.

"I wanna make a toast," she announced, standing up.

Everyone silenced their side conversations and gave her their full attention.

"I just wanted to say how happy I am that my family is with me." She gave each of them long and happy looks over the steaming trays of food. "It means a lot to me to have everyone here. And I know Spike and Claire are happy too. "Buffy closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She didn't know what else to say that could truly express how she felt and she knew if she tired to carry on the tears would fall. She simply sat back in her seat and Giles gave the blessing of the food.

As soon as Giles was finished, there was a mad dash for the food. Claire had really outdone herself with the cooking and there were mounds of pancakes, a full platter of scrambled eggs, her famous beef briskets and buttermilk cornbread. Everything smelled divine.

"I helped Claire," Jocelyn piped up.

Except for a few light conversations, everyone was busy munching and relishing the delicious food.

"Good job," Buffy told her in between mouthfuls.

"You were very helpful," Claire agreed. She had reappeared from the house with an empty plate and began piling on the food.

"Please, sit down and eat your wonderful meal." Giles told her.

Buffy knew Giles wouldn't mind Claire sitting close to him. She snickered at the thought and drank her fresh squeezed orange juice.

"I will." Claire gave Giles a flirty wink. "I'm taking this plate down to Spike. He loves my beef brisket."

"Hurry back," Giles called after her retreating form.

Buffy couldn't believe her ears. "Giles," she whispered. "You are flirting with Claire. You can't flirt with Claire."

"And why not," Giles countered with a mischievous glint in his eye. "I think she fancies me and you'll be over the rainbow soon anyways, so perhaps I can charm her to come stay with me."

Buffy dropped her mouth in mock surprise and then giggled so hard her sides were hurting. Giles joined in with her and pretty soon the whole table was in uproar.

"I'm going to get a cramp," Willow laughed still stuffing her face.

"Giles," Dawn said shaking her head in disbelief. "I can't believe you just said that."

Giles grinned and shrugged his shoulders as the table returned to more eating and grunting. Claire came back just as the last guffaws were dying down and she fixed herself a small helping and sat on the other side of Giles. This move stirred up some calmer chuckles but those too soon died down as everyone returned their attention back to eating.

"You're still a wolf," Jocelyn said to Oz. "Right?"

"Sure," Oz replied lightly.

"Don't you wanna eat me," Jesse asked dramatically.

Jocelyn rolled her eyes at her brother.

"He probably doesn't taste very good," Raven said trying to keep the syrup from running off his face.

"Really," Oz paused from his eating to talk. "What makes you say that?"

"I don't know," Raven shrugged. "He eats a lot of junk food."

"And he doesn't like to take baths." Jocelyn wrinkled her nose in disgust.

Oz smiled. "I'll eat him if you really want me to." He cast Jesse a hungry glance.

"Hey, hey," Xander interjected. "There will be no eating of the children at the table."

"So, Oz," Buffy began, "if you aren't eating little children; what are you doing these days?"

"Are you still in New Mexico," Willow asked?

"Yes, I am. I joined a pack out there. I own an auto body shop and I restore oldies to their original polish and shine. It's a hobby. I'm still in a band and I only change when I want to."

Buffy was impressed.

"You're in a pack. Good for you," Robin told him.

"Yeah," Oz agreed. "It's the best thing that could've happened to me. These guys have been living with it for centuries and they really helped me achieve greater balance within. I am now one with the wolf. When I change now, it is to honor Mother Nature. We are in wolf form to patrol our territory and sometimes to cull the deer population but we also become wolf to celebrate being alive."

"Dad, can I go?" Raven asked.

"Maybe this summer," Robin replied.

"Please do," Oz said. "We welcome company."

"Me too," Jesse piped up. "As long as I don't get eaten."

"I wanna go with Robin and Raven," Jocelyn said with pleading eyes to her parents.

Dawn caved in first. "Well, maybe we will get together and drive out there this summer. It will be fun."

The kids clapped their hands together and cheered.

Buffy sighed in relief. They would still support each other even after she was gone. She quickly said a prayer to the heavens for allowing her to spend her final days surrounded by the people she held most dear.

**Hi again. I do not own Buffy or any of the BVS characters. Thank you for reading my chapters. I really appreciate all the comments and feedback. I also plan on introducing more characters. It's all about finding the right moment. Well, take care and have awesome weeks.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

The mid part of the day found the house quiet. Xander and Robin had walked the kids down to the beach to gather seashells and play in the waves, Dawn and Angela had gone shopping for dinner because they had something special planned for everyone. Giles and Willow had retreated to their rooms to read and rest and Oz was meditating in the backyard.

Buffy was lying in the arms of her dead lover as he fingered the ends of her golden hair.

"I need a trim." She told.

"Your hair has always been beautiful to me." Spike assured her still holding the hair as if it were gold.

Buffy relaxed and sighed. She had started to feel uncomfortably hot after breakfast and she relished in the way his porcelain skin cooled her down. If her cheeks were still flushed and damp with perspiration, Spike didn't let on and she appreciated the fact that he appeared unfazed.

"Everything about you is beautiful to me." He whispered.

Buffy's insides tingled and glowed. "Really?" She piped up. "Even now?"

"Especially now." Spike drew her head up to meet his lips and they lingered there before moving on to other languid and lovely activities.

It was in the relishing moments after that Buffy had the dream that she would change her life. She was aware that she was curled up in an exhausted heap next to Spike in his bed. Her body still glowed and the heat on her skin wasn't from her illness. She was also aware that she wasn't breathing and there was a light that poured in from all sides and touched the sleeping vampire but did not burn him nor wake him up. She wasn't afraid and when she started to float towards the ceiling; she was filled with peace. Buffy smiled warmly and saw Spike unmoving and unharmed beneath her. She continued to rise warmly like baking bread and she knew she didn't want this feeling to go away.

The current blew her out of the house and past the yard. She flew over the gang returning from the beach and she smiled at the children's' brightly colored buckets and smiles on all faces but they gave no indication that they could see her. She flew past a coyote hunting mice in the tall grasses and it tensed then relaxed as it sensed her but also knew she wouldn't hurt him.

Soon, she was lowered into a clearing but she felt neither chill or discomfort. The sheet she had been wrapped up in after her tousle with Spike still clung to her naked skin. Buffy smiled and thought again of her untrimmed hair; running her fingers over it. She was not alone.

There was a figure washed in a glow that descended upon her with a warm smile and outstretched arms.

"Mom?" Buffy whispered feeling the first stirrings of a sob.

Her mother hugged her softly and smelled of lemons and sandalwood just like she used to.

"Buffy." Joyce said. "Is it time?"

"Huh?" Buffy asked.

"Is it time?" Joyce repeated.

"I've missed you." Buffy told her mom. She was almost afraid to look her in the face for fear the mirage would fade away. She clung ferociously to her mother and nuzzled her shoulder.

"Honey." Joyce replied. "I've always been with you."

"I know." Buffy told her. "But it's not the same."

"Is it supposed to be?" Her mother asked. "Nothing ever stays the same."

Her mother stood and took her with her. "Is it time?" Joyce asked her again.

Suddenly, another figure approached them from the sea. "Hey, B."

Buffy's eyes widened in surprise and she took in the long, cascading dark hair, the half smile and the shining eyes. "Faith!"

Faith's smile grew a little bit more as she threw her a knowing smile.

Buffy felt crimson stain her cheeks but she kept her cool and hugged Faith because she was really glad to see her again.

"Your going out in style." Faith told her. "I'm impressed."

Faith gave her the once over and Buffy was glad that going to the other side didn't mean you lost your personality. She smiled at Faith and the two clasped hands.

"Your family is beautiful." She told the other slayer.

"Thanks," Faith sighed. "I love them."

"Are you ready"? Joyce asked Buffy.

"No, not yet." The question was answered by another female voice and Buffy knew who it belonged to.

"Tara!" Buffy unstuck herself from Faith and her mother and turned back to hug the friend who still had eyes that mirrored her heart.

"Tara." Buffy closed her eyes and relished in the sight and sound of her long lost friend.

Tara kissed her cheeks gently and touched her face. Faith and Joyce joined them and they enclosed her in a circle of smiles and power.

The circle grew and increased in speed as Anya appeared in human form and Cordelia came to join in the celebration of a life greatly lived.

"You've really aged." Anya told her.

"Thanks." Buffy grinned. How had she survived without Anya's perspective and critic?

Cordy only smiled at her. They didn't have anything to say to each other but Buffy was happy that she chose to be there.

"Love is forever, Buffy." Anya told her. "Xander should know that I wait for him."

"Okay." Buffy replied.

"Dawn only married him because I was killed."

Faith gave Anya a disapproving look and she rolled her eyes but motioned that she would zip her lips.

Buffy choked back a laugh because she didn't want to ruin the solemnity of the moment.

Ms. Calendar was the last to join the circle. "There is power in this." She told her. She briefly touched her face.

Buffy's eyes rested on each and every one. They looked as they had in life: beautiful, vibrant and she was honored that they chose to appear to help her on her way.

"You mean so much to me." She told them all.

"Are you ready, B?" Faith asked her. "Are you ready?"

Buffy thought she was. She felt sure that she was but there was still something nagging her brain that she couldn't hide away…

"Not quite." She told them all.

"I told you guys this would happen." Anya said pointedly.

Faith tried to silence her with a look.

Anya shrugged. "I mean…oh forget it." Anya looked at her and snapped her fingers.

Suddenly, Buffy awoke next to Spike to the sounds of her own screams.

**I'm really sorry that I haven't updated in awhile, but I'm really glad that I was finally able to add this chapter. Hope that you all enjoyed!**


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